On the road again!  The 0-2 Chicago Bears head to Dallas to take on the overrated Cowboys on Sunday Night Football. Who is ready for some prime time football?!? This is going to make for a fun ESPN First Take episode as Stephen A. Smith is going to rip apart the losing team. That losing team will most likely be the Bears, but here are 5 keys to winning Sunday night.

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Offensive Line: With Cutler sidelined with a thumb injury, the Bears put all their trust into backup veteran quarterback Brian Hoyer. The big bald turnover machine is going to have the opportunity to prove everyone that he is a legitimate starter in the NFL. He needs this game way more than anyone else (well Fox and Pace need this pretty badly too). In order for Hoyer to play decent football, he is going to need all the protection in the world against a solid Dallas defense. It really doesn’t matter who the Bears face, the pass protection needs to step up big time, or else I will be suiting up as the new quarterback. Hopefully, this O-line can step up big and give Hoyer the protection he will desperately need.

More from the Running Attack: Jeremy Langford is still looking for much needed improvement. He started the first half of Monday night looking like he was going to have a solid performance, however, in the second half he had a brutal fumble and did not establish himself well. I think for Langford to develop as a better runner, the Bears need to spread their running attack. Let’s hope that former UAB and Indiana University star Jordan Howard can continue to receive more touches. Howard has the potential to be a breakout player in the NFL, and will hopefully step up in the Bears running game.

Defense Needs 3rd Down Stops: Again and again, the Bears defense looks solid on 1st and 2nd down, but then forgets how to play on 3rd down. How many more times is it going to be 3rd and 5 and they leave a man wide open for an easy first down? Jay Cutler is not the only injured Bear; many of the guys on the defense are hurt including Danny Trevathan, Eddie Goldman, and Lamarr Houston. It is vital that Coach Fox’s “next man up” mentality can pay off for the Bears to have any success Sunday night. Hopefully, the defense can show up on 3rd down and hold the Cowboys from gaining any momentum.

A Successful Kicker: Connor Barth, YOU HAVE ONE JOB! DO IT RIGHT OR WE WANT ROBBIE BACK!!!

CAN IT FINALLY BE TIME? MILLER TIME: Hopefully, a new quarterback means finding new targets. Who is that new target? ZACH MILLER! Let’s hope to see Hoyer on the run finding big bad Zach deep down field to make for some nice chemistry and finally establish Miller as the elite Tight end that he is.

Game Prediction Bears 17 Cowboys 16: “WHAT???? AFTER YOU BASHED THE BEARS IN A 10 MINUTE VIDEO YOU ACTUALLY PICKED THEM TO WIN?!?!” Yeah nerds, I actually did. Will the Bears win? Maybe not, maybe go fuck yourself. Remember when everyone was all worried when Cutler got hurt and then Josh McCown stepped up huge for the Bears? I am in no way comparing McCown to Hoyer, but I just see this game as a fluke. I see the Cowboys stooping down to the Bears level and Hoyer having 150 yards, a TD, and an interception, which will be good enough for the Bears to sneak away with one in Dallas and have idiot fans say “Cut Cutler now and start Hoyer.” Go ahead and laugh, I don’t care what anyone thinks, the Cowboys are overrated. They always have been and always will be. The Bears are not a better team than Dallas, but I predict they finally catch a little bit of luck. Either the Bears sneak away with a win, or I will be 100% wrong and they get blown out by Dallas and my Packer friend Riley will text me laughing at me and I will be on the verge of tears.

Miller Lite Prediction: 5. Last week, I had way more Miller Lite tall boys than anyone, including myself, predicted. I predict that I have 5 12 oz cans of Miller as I will be recovering from a family wine fest this Saturday in Indiana. Best cure for a headache Sunday morning? An ice cold Miller Lite!  BEAR DOWN!

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