Crime of the Century: Bartolo Colon DFA’d

Ladies and Gentlemen,

I never thought we would see this day. Surely after 19 years as a pro and 44 years of life experience, there was no way the invincible god of the mound would fail to transcend all age barriers ever foreseen. He was going to be the one modern athlete to give us hope that Tom Brady is not the only exception to the rule. After posting a WAR of 3.4 and a 15-8 record with a 3.43 ERA and 1.21 WHIP at the ripe age of 43, surely this would not be the year of regression for the GOAT. Especially after committing to fitness, absolutely no way he could regress after putting on CC Sabathia type weight and still dominating.


But, oh how the times have changed, my friends. Last night was a truly devastating day in my life. It was a day I most certainly will not forget soon—the day Bartolo Colon may have pitched his last MLB game. At $12.5 MM and 44 years old with an 8.18 ERA, 1.78 WHIP and -1.9 WAR through only 13 starts, the Braves certainly are not in the wrong to designate the conceivably lost legend for assignment. But my goodness does it hurt the heart to know we may never be graced by Bartolo’s greatness again.


My best bet is that the Mets will find a way to bring him back as a mentor if nothing else, but I am in a full state of grieving for now. So, let the montage begin. Long Live Big Sexy, we still love you Bartolo. Atlanta never deserved you anyways.


We’ll miss the way you smiled at us…

Colon Smile
Photo Credit:

We’ll miss the way you taught us the virtue of patience…

Colon Home Run
Photo Credit: Topps

But most of all, we’ll miss the way you taught us that there is an athlete in each and every one of us… So for that, we are forever grateful.

Rest easy down in AAA ball big fella, I am sure we will see you again soon.